A baby shower is something that almost every mom hosts to help her get used to the idea of becoming a mom, but do guys go to baby showers?
The answer to the question: do guys go to baby showers? was once a resounding “no”, however nowadays things have changed, as you’re very likely to see dads getting more involved in the whole process.
In the past, fathers were traditionally the breadwinners of the family, while mothers stayed at home to take care of the kids and the house, however, this line has become more and more blurred in modern times.
The dawn of the 21st century heralded the beginning of a lot of new traditions, and gender role reversals were one of the first we saw.
We see more and more parents striving for individuality, where both mothers and fathers want careers alongside successful parenting.
It’s becoming more and more common to see both parents getting involved with their children’s lives, and it’s no longer strange to see a mother who is the sole breadwinner with a husband who stays at home.
But how does this new family dynamic affect baby showers?
Well, that’s the question I aim to answer in this article.
So, Do Guys Go To Baby Showers?
While still not particularly common, they are attending them more often, and co-ed baby showers are happening more frequently all the time.
As I mentioned at the beginning of the article, the idea of a traditional baby shower is slowly being phased out.
It’s no longer just an event for the mom to be and all her close friends to celebrate the arrival of a new baby, play silly games, and talk about motherhood and all the challenges that it brings about.
The more modern concept involves the father too, either as an extra guest at the baby shower centered around the mother to be, as a co-ed event so that the dad to be is also included in the celebration, or as two separate baby showers.
While the trend of men attending baby showers is becoming more commonplace, guys might not want to listen to the things women talk about amongst themselves, and vice versa.
That said, co-ed baby showers are still great for bringing your family members and loved ones together, instead of having only the female half of the family tree attend.
On the other hand, it’s also an ideal opportunity for a couples hangout event, and a way to invite all your co-workers, and both girl and guy friends, so they don’t feel left out.
However, you should be careful of how you go about this, because holding a co-ed baby shower does pose a few new challenges.
Alternatively, these problems can be avoided if the dad opts to organize a more guy themed baby shower to help celebrate fatherhood, and get some input and advice from his guy friends and any veteran dads.
After all, if we get to enjoy chill-out time with our friends to discuss advice on motherhood, why wouldn’t the men be allowed the same?
Personally, I think they need the chance to relieve stress and enjoy themselves just as much as we do, especially as I know just how hard my husband worked to help provide for the family so we’d be able to live a normal life and have our needs met.
The 9 Best Ways To Include Men In Baby Showers
If your answer to the question: Do guys go to baby showers? is a “yes”, then you might want to look into how to have them more involved in the celebration.
Be sure to keep in mind that you’ll need to adjust a few things in order to make the traditional version a bit more welcoming for men.
1. Ask your husband if he wants to be included
While the idea of having men attend baby showers is a good one, you shouldn’t force your husband to attend if he doesn’t want to.
While it can be a great bonding experience and an excellent way to strengthen your bond as new parents, partners have to respect each other’s wishes.
If he doesn’t feel comfortable attending, there’s no point going through with the idea.
That said, you can still invite your own male friends if you want to, but that presents an entirely new set of hurdles.
2. Curate your guest list carefully
If you’re looking to add men into the mix at your baby shower, the number of potential guests increases, so you have to take the extra cost of the party plans into consideration.
Rule #1 applies here as well, except to your guy friends rather than your husband.
Not every guy wants to attend something that has been so traditionally female for so long, and might find himself being awkwardly excluded or feeling out of place at a baby shower.
It’s nice to ask, but don’t be too upset if they don’t end up having the time, or desire, to attend an event like this.
3. Make the party colors a bit more gender neutral
If you do end up with some male guests, you should know that co-ed baby showers follow a different set of rules than more traditional ones.
The theme shouldn’t be all flowers and rainbows in a wave of pastel pink, as that could cause the same problems as rule #2.
Try keeping the party theme a bit more gender neutral with colors that appeal to both men and women.
4. Change up the party meal plan
When men are involved in a baby shower, the catering also requires a bit of an adjustment.
You’ll want to include meals that are a bit more filling than just cupcakes and appetizers. If you serve cake, this is a great opportunity to pick a fun message for the baby shower cake that reflects both parents’ personalities!
A BBQ usually works, though you should be careful not to let the smoke from the grill affect the party area too much.
5. Make it a bit more interesting for the guys
In order to make the most of a baby shower with a mixed group of guys and girls, it’s a good idea to try adding some baby shower games into the mix.
Some of the best baby shower ideas for games usually involve making it into a couples activity, so be sure that the people paired up are familiar with one another.
6. Make the party favors more appropriate
As you’re changing the theme, it’s only appropriate to also change almost everything else about the baby shower, including the party favors that you hand out to guests.
There are two ways of going about this.
The first is to divide the party favors based on gender, so you have specific gifts for guys and girls.
That might end up being a lot more work than you’d first anticipated, and even make the guests feel bad.
The other option is to simply make the party favors a bit more gender-neutral, giving something that’s appropriate for everyone; a silly gimmick like a mug, coaster, or even a T-shirt with a silly caption, depending on how much you want to spend.
7. Make a gift registry
The main reason why so many people answer “no” to the question: Do guys go to baby showers? is because it’s hard to get into something that’s been for girls only for so long, and they might feel awkward about trying to fit into it.
Most guys are still new to the idea of baby showers, so they often won’t know what expecting parents might want to receive as gifts when they attend one.
So, to reduce the amount of potentially awkward moments, make sure to get a gift registry sorted with all the things that you might find useful, and include it with the invite or post it in the group you’re organizing it in.
This way, the men can get a little bit of insight and be prepared ahead of time, without having to be the first ones to ask about which gifts to get.
Try to keep it simple too, something they can easily afford that doesn’t involve a lot of effort like baby bottles or baby food, maybe even a diaper bag or some baby clothes.
Be sure to include some low budget options so they don’t have to go splurging on expensive gifts.
Alternatively, if you managed to get your husband involved, just have them bring him gifts that will help him with raising his first child.
8. Have separate rooms for the male and female guests (optional)
One of the main reasons for men saying no to the question: Do guys go to baby showers? is that they might feel uncomfortable having to listen to the awkward motherhood topics being discussed.
Providing a separate room for the men in attendance works really well when done properly.
While this might sound a bit unwelcoming at first, it really helps with avoiding any potential awkwardness by providing separate spaces where girls can be girls and guys can be guys.
For instance, when I had my second baby shower I used the living room to host my girlfriends so we could have a nice, relaxing time de-stressing from pregnancy woes, and getting excited about the baby with my friends.
Meanwhile, my hubby was having his half of the baby shower in the backyard with his friends, and they all messed around playing more physical games and grilling up their own food to celebrate the imminent birth of his 2nd child.
The two places weren’t mutually exclusive either, as we’d mingle every now and again depending on people’s preferences, but it was nice to have two separate spaces people could move between freely.
9. Let the husband have a guys baby shower
A baby shower is traditionally meant to be an event to help the mother de-stress and learn about motherhood, but there’s no reason why a dad can’t do the same with his friends.
However, he might not be keen to do it in the co-ed style we discussed previously, and instead want to hold a more guy-oriented baby shower.
This is a great way to avoid either of you having to change your idea of the ideal baby shower theme just to accommodate the tastes of all your guests, or the other men from feeling awkward and out of place.
Your husband can organize his own baby shower if he wants, where there’s space for unimpeded guy talk and for boys to be boys, so to speak.
It’s great for the guys to have time for themselves, where they can watch the game on TV, not worry about a strict theme, and order takeout while discussing what it’s like to be a dad.
This way they can celebrate in their own way, depending on what it is they prefer doing.
This way you both get your own special time and your ideal version of the perfect baby shower.
In Conclusion
While the question: do guys go to baby showers? leans more toward “yes” than “no” than it used to, the idea of a guy attending one is still not that well received depending on the context.
A woman bringing her significant other to a baby shower, only for him to discover he’s the only man there, is still going to feel as awkward as it would have in the past simply because he’d feel like the odd man out in a group full of women talking about very intimate things.
Imagine being a guy who has to sit and listen to a conversation about nipples cracking from breastfeeding and other similar things.
You wouldn’t find it all that exciting either.
However, if things are properly planned out so there’s an equal amount of male and female guests who have equal amounts of engagement, along with the choice to distance themselves from unwanted conversations, it becomes a lot more welcoming.
That being said, this could pose a bit of extra work on your end and might make you have to compromise your ideal baby shower plans.
Luckily, if your husband is willing to hold a guy’s baby shower, he can schedule one on a separate date and organize his own ideal event.
That way you both get to have your cake and eat it too, without having to go through the extra trouble of appeasing everyone at the same time.
If you’re considering it, make sure to think it through before starting your plans, and I’m sure you’ll be able to come up with the ideal solution for your situation.
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